A recent poll conducted online pharmacy in the UK, ukmedix.com, found that 62 per cent of male respondents in long term relationships turned down sex more often than their partner. The survey also discovered the top excuses men use to bail on a night of intimacy, which are saying that they’re tired, have a headache, stressed about work, too full from dinner or something good is on television (Who would want to miss New Girl for sex, anyways?).
Get over it boys. We’re not letting you off the hook that easily. Christine Hart, dating and relationship expert, explains how to get to the bottom of his top “sexcuses.”
“If it happens here and there and it’s accompanied with an apology, then that’s legitimate,” says Hart. “Men go through cycles tike women do when they’re into and then they’re not.”
But what do you do if it seems like you and your partner have been in a dry spell for a while? “When it starts to feel suspicious, or you think there is something else going on, you can ask to talk about it.” Hart recommends starting the conversation off with a non-accusatory statement, like ‘It seems like you have a lot on your mind lately’. Then listen, and don’t judge or make him feel guilty about skipping out on sex. He may feel be back in the mood after letting it all out.
Never take a “sexcuse” personally. “Don’t automatically think that it’s about you,” says Hart. There’s no need to run out and buy the newest toy or lingerie if your man turns you down. Conversation and communication are the most important parts of a healthy sex life according to Hart. Creating a strong bond will lead to better sex.
But what if you’re the one who’s not in the mood? Hart suggests that you make eye or body contact when turning down your guy. Then tell him you love him, assure him that you’re very attracted to him and that he always does it for you, but that you just need to be honest and say that you’re not in the mood because of ______(fill in with excuse). Then, make plans right then and there to have a special date night soon to make up for it.