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The perils of dating a hottie

Kate Upton is officially off the market. Our expert, Bobby Box, dicussed why we go for the hottie despite the dangers that follow.
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Bobby Box, October 2, 2013 2:10:33 PM

Kate Upton and her bouncy chesticles are what dreams of the non-dry variety are made of. Add to that her ability to twerk (link NSFW) and her frat-worthy skills at Flip Cup, and she’s accomplished what few women have been done in the past: instill sexual fear based on perceived hotness alone. Meaning, we may feel too intimidated to perform as her appearance and reputation are both way too much to handle.

However, cocky DWTS coach, Maksim Chmerkovskiy, 33, put on his alpha male cape and bagged himself the chesty supermodel. He and Upton, 21 — whose courtship was speculated three months ago — are together without refute, as they were photographed holding hands while taking a stroll through New York’s West Village last Thursday.

While mere weeks ago Upton denied relationship rumours to various news outlets, a source told In Touch “they are getting serious and are both moving to NYC full time to spend more time together. She’s met Mak’s family when she came to Huntington Harbor in August for his godmother’s wedding.” According to E! News, the pair has been together for six months.

Dating a hottie has its obvious perks, but the disadvantages far outweigh the advantages. Don’t believe me? Write out a pros and cons list. I started one for you:


  • They are good-looking


  • You will compete with others who are constantly trying to sleep with them
  • You will get in fights (verbal/physical) with people who will flirt/hit on them
  • You’ll become jealous and possessive as a result of the above
  • You will feel incredibly insecure
  • You will become an ignorable fixture when in public with them
  • People will question why they are dating you (money or magical genitals will be a few of the more popular speculations)

Regardless of what’s listed above, we can’t help but hope for the hottie. Studies have been done to prove this, a few of which I’ve listed below.

A study in January of last year proved both women and men desire a sexually attractive partner, even if they claim otherwise. Using a high-speed word association test, the results found that people responded faster to words linked with sexiness, no matter how low they prioritized physicality in a partner prior to the test. Researchers suggest the mismatch between what we say we want and what we want may be the reason many online dating meet-ups end poorly.

A few years ago, Psychologist Alison Lenton and economist Marco Francesconi analyzed records from 84 different speed-dating events held in bars and clubs across the UK. The events included 1,868 women and 1,879 men total. Lenton chose to survey speed-daters as she hoped to prove that people with more choice will go for looks.

The scientists found that when there were more people to choose from, it was more likely that men and women would make judgments based on appearance. And at smaller speed dating events, both men and women were more willing to find out more about the person. Lenton also compares the results of her study to online dating, where people can search through thousands of photos and profiles.

We can say we aren’t shallow, but these studies prove otherwise. And the heart wants what the heart wants. Unfortunately, for thousands of men worldwide, the breasts heart we want — Kate Upton’s — belongs to another. (Douche.)


Rich video player that appears in Loop Living for Pets video content.

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