Glee has been losing me for awhile. I mean, I missed three episodes in a row and I didn’t care one bit. This coming from the girl who once owned a Warblers t-shirt and attended the Glee concert tour as a part of my college graduation present. (I’m the coolest, OK!?) But McKinley High’s finest reeled this same girl, a certified Cinefille, back in this week by simply getting reel.
Thursday’s new Glee, the aptly Duran Duran-referencing “Girls (And Boys) on Film,” was explicitly movie soundtrack-themed, featuring tributes to some of the greatest movies (or at least greatest movie soundtracks) of all time. I may be biased, since I’ve been obsessed with “The Movies” since shortly after birth when my mom showed me my first VHS copy of E.T. (I had multiple copies, because I watched it so much), but there’s nothing quite as magical as a stellar film score and/or song. As my boyfriend, Jesse from Pitch Perfect, once explained, a great movie score can take a otherwise lacklustre moment, like say, Judd Nelson pumping his fist at the sky, and turn it into something you’ll never forget.
I’m sure that I would say I’ll “never forget” “Girls (And Boys) on Film,” but it was pretty fun, especially since I got every single one of the references (truth be told, the Eli Roth and Nightmare on Elm St. 3: Dream Warriors nods within the first five minutes hit home with me the most). While a lot of stuff went down plot-wise (Rachel appears to actually be preggo, while Finn told Schue about his kiss with Emma!), the highlights were definitely the musical numbers, so I’ve decided to go through each of them in both film geeky and gleeky detail.
1) “You’re All the World to Me,” Royal Wedding (Will/Emma)
Popcorny factor: 5
This was a fairly loyal recreation of the Fred Astaire-starring scene, with Will and Emma walking on the walls and ceiling and everything. Only this bit was done completely in the black and white and featured classy, suited-up costuming. It was truly cinematic. And a little bit “Certain scenes of that Michael Jackson/Janet Jackson video.”
Corny factor: 1
This was, like Will and Emma, pure class. Yes, if you’re unfamiliar with the film, you might have found the Spider-man-esque wall-walking a bit much, but otherwise, it was actually quite low on the cheese scale for Glee. A perfect, if misleading, way to start off the episode.
2) “Shout,” Animal House (New Directions)
Popcorny factor: 3
While the ND kids definitely captured Animal House‘s party vibe with their mid-classroom conga line, they really should have been wearing togas. Don`t tell me they don’t have togas around somewhere. If they have full flight suits on hand at a last-minute Tom Cruise tribute’s notice (see: No. 4), they’ve got to have sheets around they could fashion into traditional Greek letter gear! Maybe some leftovers from that time Will ended up with a whole bunch of mattresses?
Corny factor: 3
As noted above, I actually think this could have been more corny, especially since it was the big 500th performance. Go Blutto, or go home, I say! Or at least let Sam do his best John Belushi impression. You know he’d do a great “I’m a zit!”
3) `Come What May,`Moulin Rouge (Blaine and Kurt)
Popcorny factor: 5
Any Moulin Rouge aficionado, Kurt Hummel included, would agree that this was a lovely, thought-out tribute. Set atop a roof remarkably similar to the one seen in the actual “Come What May” number (as well as “Elephant Love Medley”) and featuring an impeccably Ewan McGregor-evoking (looks-wise, anyway) Blaine, this number lifted me up to places where only Satine and Christian’s love belongs. (OK, maybe Blaine and Kurt`s too!)
Corny factor: 4
While the main part of this scene was gorgeous and scenic, the beginning was smothered in the gouda stuff, as hazy memories of Klaine’s early romance were cut between shots of Blaine singing. I don’t need to relive these scenes through Rupaul’s Drag Race‘s Vaseline lens. I already relive them every time they kiss. In HD. In my mind. (Klaine forever!!)
4) “Danger Zone,” Top Gun/”Old Time Rock n`Roll,” Risky Business (The boys of New Directions)
Popcorny factor: 3
The costumes were certainly accurate, with Blaine making a flight suit and aviators look Ice(man) cool, and Sam and Jake going pants-less to tribute that famous living room-set ’80s Tom Cruise dance number. But the performance took place in the choir room, taking away from the specifically themed magic. Also, no homoerotic volleyball between Blaine and Sam? You just lost my loving feeling, Glee.
Corny factor: 4
Did Blaine actually pretend to be a plane while lying on his stomach on the stairs? You bet he did.
5) “Sparkling Diamonds,” Moulin Rouge (The girls of New Directions)
Popcorny factor: 3
This mash-up, which pit Marilyn Monroe’s “Diamonds Are a Girl’s Best Friend” against Madonna’s “Material Girl,” may have been stripped from Moulin Rouge, but you wouldn’t have known it from watching this scene. Instead of having the girls dress up in their high-class Parisian prostitute finest, Glee‘s costuming department decided to have them wear replicas of the pink ball gowns Monroe did in Gentlemen Prefer Blondes. I suppose it worked on that level, but I almost wish they had just stuck to “Diamonds,” if that’s the route they wanted to go. It’s a great song on it’s own, and Moulin Rouge was already covered, quite impeccably.
Corny factor: 3
Since the number mainly hinged on the outfits, which can’t be super easy to dance in when you’re not being lifted up by a string of adoring dudes, luckily there wasn’t much room for cheesy choreography. It was one of the most straight sing-songs of the night, almost to a fault.
6) “In Your Eyes,” Say Anything… (Will and New Directions)
Popcorny factor: 4
Just as John Cusack did in that perfect, underrated ’80s dramedy, Will wore an oversized trenchcoat and held a boombox up to Emma’s window. No mention of him giving her his heart and her returning the favour with a pen, though.
Corny factor: 5
Not even an authentic ’80s boombox could make up for Will’s terrifying overly sincere face while he was singing with it.
7) “Unchained Melody,” Ghost (Jake, Marley and Ryder)
Popcorny factor: 4
Hello, art room pottery wheel!
Corny factor: 5
While the number started off sweetly enough, with Jake and Marley evoking that famously sexy (or unsexy, depending on your feelings for forCLAY) with Patrick Swayze and Demi Moore, it quickly got weird as Marley started imagining Ryder in Jake’s place. As if that wasn’t awkward enough, Marley was watching herself kiss Ryder in her vision. I knew that girl was a secret perv.
8) “Footloose,” Footloose (All of New Directions)
Popcorny factor: 2
Sorry, but coloured string lights are not enough to properly evoke one of the most legendary warehouse-set high school dance sequences of all-time! Yes, the dance moves were spot on, but where were the burgundy suits? Even the guy who played Ren in the remake knew that was a necessity!
Corny factor: 1
It was almost too straight forward for such a theatrical episode. Perhaps it might have been more effective as a middle of the road number? It just seemed like a lacklustre, half-hearted way to end things. Although, I did appreciate the sparkly confetti at the end.
What did you think of Glee’s cinematic tribute? Which other movies should they have included? Comment below! Or hit up TV Guide Canada on Facebook and/or Twitter!
Glee airs Thursdays at 9 p.m. on Global/Fox.
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