So, you had a rough day at the office, eh?
Did your boss affix your body to a wheel and then hurl knives at your torso as it spun around? Did he or she make you scale a 90-storey building with your bare hands? Did they force you on a plane full of Ebola-stricken patients?
No? Then you don’t know what a rough day is, friend.
Daily Planet’s “Insane Jobs Week” kicked off Monday on Discovery, and we can honestly say that after watching some of the highlights, our 9 to 5 desk jobs are starting to look like a breeze (although paperwork isn’t quite as exciting as, say, racing ostriches down a dirt road). So, whether you’re looking for new job inspiration, or for someone who’s definitely having a harder day than you are, check out the slideshow of insane jobs below:
10 jobs so crazy you never knew they existed
Pet food testerAnd you thought your lunch was bad! Pet food testers exist, both to evaluate the nutritional value of pet food and also to taste-test it. And yes, that means putting it in their mouths (although most opt to spit it back out before swallowing). At least now we know why animals love their Kibbles 'n Bits.ThinkStock
Ostrich RacerIf you're a fan of rodeos or the Calgary Stampede, you should love ostrich racing. The birds can reach surprising speeds of over 50 km/h! But be warned, things will likely get messy as many of the racers finish their jobs in the dirt. If you're interested, Arizona holds an ostrich festival every year. Discovery
Ebola plane doctorRemember the guy who joked that he had Ebola on a plane? Well, now there's a whole plane dedicated to transporting Ebola-stricken patients. And just imagine working on that aircraft, full-time. A team of doctors do just that, ready to take off within 12 hours at a moment's notice. Fortunately, there's a host of technology on board to keep them safe, including a possible day-long decontamination process upon landing. Getty
Prostitute testerNo, we're not kidding. Protitute testers are a thing, and a social media company in Germany was recently seeking a qualified candidate. The lucky applicant selected would have to review brothels throughout the country, evaluating things like service, cleanliness and safe-sex practices. And yes, the job requires having sex with many, many sex workers. Getty
Cricket FarmerWho's hungry? Campbellford, Ont. is home to Canada's largest (and possibly only) cricket farm, where the insects are raised and processed for human consumption. Three brothers started the business, and you can just imagine what it's like to crawl a day in their shoes. Daily Planet hosts Ziya Tong and Dan Riskin will have the hardest job of all, though: Sampling one of the farm's crunchy cricket snacks! The Canadian Press
Keeper of the CupDue to the sacred nature of the Stanley Cup, it must be accompanied by what amounts to a professional babysitter whenever it's away from its permanent home (at the Hockey Hall of Fame). Right now, there are seven of these keepers who diligently watch over it. While we can't tell you what kind of salary they can expect, the first Keeper of the Cup has been doing the job since 1989.Twitter/@keeperofthecup
Knife throwerWhen it comes to knife throwing, we don't know who has it worse: The person throwing the knives or the assistant trying not to become a human pin cushion. Either way, there's a lot more science behind this art than you might think, to ensure those blades hit the spots they're supposed to. After all, this is one job where you aren't allowed to make mistakes.Getty
Golf Ball DiverEver wonder what happens to golf balls after they go "kerplunk!" in a pond or water trap? Someone actually has to throw on a scuba tank and go looking for them. Daily Planet will be speaking with Craig Stewart, a Navy-trained golf ball diver who collects, processes and resells the white gold from his shop in the U.S. Discovery
Face FeelerDo you want to work with your hands? Are you a people person? Then you might have what it takes to become the next big face feeler. Often known as "sensory scientists," these people are hired to feel people's faces and skin after they use hygiene products like razors or shaving cream. They then provide an objective opinion as to which product works best. Surprisingly, they can make anywhere from $10 to $25 per hour.ThinkStock
Human SpidermanWe guess this really isn't a job per se, but one man has made a living for himself by scaling tall buildings without a harness. Alain Robert recently climbed a 75-storey skyscraper in Dubai with nothing other than sticky tape and some chalk. In 2011, he scaled the Burj Khalifa, the world's tallest tower (although he used a rope and harness on that occasion). Whatever they pay this guy, it probably isn't enough. Discovery
You can check out Daily Planet’s “Insane Jobs Week” from May 4-8 on Discovery at 7 p.m. ET.