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You’ve probably noticed by now that it’s pretty cold outside.

Scratch that, it’s too cold outside. And no, no, we’re not being wussies about it. We have icicles running through our veins like all Canadians, but this winter has simply gone too far. Look what happened when someone dropped this banana. Fruit isn’t supposed to do this:

It's too cold

Not to mention, what could happen to your coffee between sips:

It's too cold

And you know those machines you find in underground parking lots? Even they’re breaking out parkas!

It's too cold

The cold is forcing humans to do things that would normally defy all logic and reason. Like attaching skates to their slippers:

It's too cold

Or hacking their mailboxes to reach over the snow bank:
It's too cold
On the plus side, all that snow also doubles as a makeshift beer fridge:

It's too cold

But not everything is adaptable. Hoses, for example:

FY86hjI

And jeans aren’t supposed to do – whatever’s actually happening here:

This is how cold it is in Quebec right now - Imgur

Then there’s the snow itself, which is piling up so high that our trains look like something out of a Freudian nightmare.

dsfdsf

That’s right. Our infrastructure is breaking down, people. Even our police force can’t deal:

Meanwhile in Canada... - Imgur

And forget parking lots. These days, they look more like exhumed cemeteries. Just try finding a spot. We dare you.

R55LUPy

And look at what happens when you try to open a window:

Giphy

Hibernating would be an easy solution, sure, but that requires food. And if you’re lucky enough to find a company that can actually drive an order to your home, it comes double boxed, just to stay warm. Mmm…cardboard.

Pizza-guy-delivers-my-pizza-in-a-second-box-to-keep-it-extra-warm-in-this-cold---Imgur

Speaking of warm, we didn’t even think this was possible, but the cold froze a volcano in Iceland. You know, those mountains that spew burning, MOLTEN LAVA all over the place. Yeah, one of those:

HEwZDoW
All of this is to say: It’s definitely too damn cold outside.

It's too cold

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