Ah, dear beloved Harry Potter. Did you know it’s been over a decade since the circle-spectacled boy wizard was first introduced to us? Obviously you did and that hasn’t stopped you from obsessing over anything and everything HP-related to this day. While you may think it’s perfectly OK to check Pottermore.com thrice a day or buy every sorting hat you see (in the hopes that it’s the real thing), everyone else thinks it’s a real problem. If you can relate to any of the following things below, you totally need to slowly let go.
1. You fainted, woke up and then fainted again upon hearing news that Universal Studios opened up a real-life Diagon Alley.
2. Emma Watson’s feminist speech at the UN was spectacular and all, but you were PO’d that she didn’t throw in a “wingardium leviosa” reference at the end just for kicks.
3. Sometimes you spend Friday nights at home sobbing uncontrollable into your pillow because Harry (Daniel Radcliffe) doesn’t look or act like Harry anymore.
4. You booked that Hogwarts-themed room in London for, like, four weeks straight, in 10 seconds flat. Now you just have to find someone to share your wizard chambers with…
5. Remember when your hand turned on odd bluish colour and cramped up for five days ’cause you were constantly refreshing Pottermore so you could view J.K. Rowling’s new post about Harry and his pals?
6. You permanently damaged your co-workers eardrums when you screeched for joy upon learning about the new Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them movies.
7. Your only mission in life is to find the real wizarding world, so when someone mapped it all out, you sucked up your fear of flying and booked a one-way trip to the U.K. Goodbye muggles, hello magic.
8. You set up a Google Alert for He Who Must Not Be Named even though Harry killed him quite some time ago.
9. When you found out that the deplorable character of Delores Umbridge is based on a real person, you swore you’d find her and give her a piece of your mind (or fist).
10. You wanted Rupert Grint to toss aside his newly-adopted pet tortoise for Scabbers 2.0, the pet rat, and you mailed him when you read he was feeling lonely in the Big Apple.
11. You got really, really, really excited when you found out that Rowling was building Hagrid’s hut on her property, then threw a Malfoy-sized temper tantrum when you learned you couldn’t visit.
12. You’re still sending Howlers to TV networks in hopes that Rupert Grint’s American TV pilot, Super Clyde, makes it to air.
13. When Daniel Radcliffe admitted he hadn’t yet read Rowling’s new Harry Potter story, not even a Patronus could cheer you up.
14. You seriously thought you had been confounded when J.K. Rowling told people Hermione should have married Harry instead of Ron.
15. You were the first in line to buy The Casual Vacancy even though you knew Harry had nothing to do with it, and then actually boycotted Pottermore for two days in protest after you read it.
16. You joined the International Quidditch Association, but renounced your membership when your team wouldn’t let you play Seeker.
17. You remember the days when JKRowling.com was an interactive flash site with Easter Eggs for fans, and continue to check back weekly in case she ever reverts back.