If you’ve been looking for someone to help motivate you to go to the gym, look no further.
According to the owner of No More Excuses Fitness in Edmonton, a man broke into the facility earlier this week just so that he could use the equipment. Meaning this guy is willing to risk jail time for something you have to practically force yourself to do.
Cheryl Schneider, the gym’s owner, said she knew something was amiss when she arrived at the studio on Monday morning. She saw that the circuit breaker had been shut off–which deactivated the emergency alarms–and that the back door’s lock had been picked. Expecting the worst, she then searched her business to see if anything had been stolen, which is where this story starts to take a very bizarre turn.
“It was left immaculate,” Schneider said during a telephone interview. “There was money, equipment–things had been moved, but nothing was stolen.”
In fact, it appears the would-be thief went out of his way to make sure he was as tidy as possible. Schneider noticed that a pair of mud-covered construction boots had been left neatly outside of the gym’s door, as though the culprit took them off to avoid treading dirt inside. Like any good athlete, the man also appears to have changed out of whatever clothes he was wearing, instead throwing on a t-shirt with the gym’s logo on it and swiping a pair of running shoes from the lost and found.
Oh, and he turned the building’s sound system on. For three hours.
“He was definitely entertaining himself,” Schneider said.
It’s the cycling area of the gym, however, where things start to get really weird. Schneider found shoes, a water bottle and noticed that the microphone for directing fitness classes was taken out, as if the man was conducting his very own workout. And a cardboard cutout of Bon Jovi, which the gym uses as a humorous mascot, had been rotated to face the wall.
“I don’t know if it was performance anxiety or what,” Schneider said. “Who knew being a fitness instructor was so glamorous?”
At the end of his workout, the man even wiped himself down with with the gym’s mint-scented towels.
Now, if a super polite individual breaking into a gym just to work out still doesn’t feel like the most Canadian crime ever, this should help seal the deal: The culprit then refueled with a Tim Hortons wrap. The packaging was found in a garbage can.
“Police were telling me this was the most bizarre break-in they had ever seen,” Schneider said.
But get this, after she called police and was showing an officer around the studio, they found that the gym bandit had returned. Fortunately though, the man apparently remained calm as police placed him under arrest, and Schneider says he’s facing some “serious” charges.
As she points out though, this guy definitely took the gym’s name–No More Excuses–a little too seriously.