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Elon Musk says we should nuke Mars to make it liveable

It’s like the old saying goes: If you want peace, prepare for war. And if you want to live on Mars, you apparently have to eradicate every speck of life that could possibly exist there already. At least that’s the word from SpaceX CEO Elon Musk, who described nuclear bombs as a “fixer-upper of a planet.” His theory? Dropping a good ol’ man-made bomb on the Red Planet would be the fastest way to heat up its surface and prepare it for human habitation. Essentially, the process would mimic global warming. But we suppose we could accidentally set off an intergalactic war…

Mars Attacks!

In Java, teens who break the 9 p.m. dating curfew may have to marry

Those who break curfew together, stay together. In a bid to prevent premarital sex, a district in Indonesia is taking on radical measures: banning teens from dating after 9 p.m. Local police patrols and new CCTV cameras will be installed to help enforce the new rule. If teens are caught breaking it more than three times, the village council may ask for the parents to marry them. That has “good idea” written all over it!

Annual pillow fight at West Point turns violent; 30 cadets hurt

They might as well have bare-knuckle brawled. West Point Military Academy in New York has an annual tradition where freshman cadets hold a massive pillow fight upon completing basic training. But this year, a few of them apparently thought it would be a good idea to put hard objects, like their helmets, in the pillowcases. Yeah, sweet dreams indeed. Needless to say, things got bloody really fast. Even though 30 cadets were reportedly injured, there are no plans to end the annual pillow showdown.

Pillow fight

Fugitive Monkey Caught, Order Restored To Kentucky Town

Police were able to put an end to some serious monkeying around in Kentucky. After the animal escaped its cage while its owner was trying to clean it, the long-tailed macaque was able to run amok for two days. Fortunately, residents in the area spotted the little guy hanging out on some trees and authorities were able to capture him. The monkey will not be returned to its owner and will instead live at the Primate Rescue Centre.

MILLIONAIRE LEAVES 100K USD TO HER BIRDS, DOG AND CAT

Talk about going “Cuckoo.” A millionaire who clearly had too much dough on her hands has been kind enough to leave a six-figure amount solely to care for her 32 cockatiels, dog and cat. Leslie Ann Mandel’s will even includes specific instructions on how the pets must be cared for. For example, she states that the birds should continue to live at the aviary in her $4 million home in New York, which means these birds have a nicer home than you do. “It is my wish that the birds be fed and the building cleaned each Monday and Thursday and their food shall be purchased from Avi-Cakes, carrots, water and popcorn,” the will states. Mandel, who has no children of her own, died at age 69.

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