Our fav athletes got all dolled up for the ESPY Awards this week, and elite as they may be on the field/track/court, these sports stars aren’t scoring any points for their fashion choices. Not a single one. Olympic gold medalist Caitlyn Jenner wore a white frock that was so far from the mark, and singer Ciara, who arrived with new husband and pro football player Russell Wilson, wore a gown that wowed in all the wrong ways.
Not far behind in the blasé fashion race was Blake Lively who wore a dress with what looked like tufts of cotton candy. And we can’t forget Kristen Stewart, who, no matter how much Chanel she wears, still lands in last place—maybe we’ll give her a participation ribbon.
Real talk: not everyone gets to be an all-star athlete and fashion icon.
Caitlyn Jenner isn’t winning gold again any time soon
Kristen StewartKristen Stewart, who’s the star of Woody Allen’s latest flick Café Society, wore head-to-toe Chanel at the premier, and looked like a real life Victorian-era painting. You know, we’re not even upset at Kristen. Really, this tragedy is all designer Karl Lagerfeld’s fault. Down with Karl!Getty Images
AshantiWhoa! Sparkly! This bedazzled number does little to quench our thirst for good fashion. From the deep neckline to the overly shiny sequins, we’re issuing a health warning: don’t look directly at this dress! Getty Images
Melissa McCarthyFrom the dramatic bell-sleeves to the dark red lip, this dark lace number looks like a prop for some cheesy high school rendition of Dracula. Not like the outfit of choice for an A-list comedian.Getty Images
Caitlyn JennerWe’re all cheering on team Caitlyn. (Seriously, did you see her Sports Illustrated cover?) But the Olympian did not win our affection with this look. The long, flowing cape sleeves that dragged on the floor look like a Jennifer Lawrence stumble waiting to happen. Getty Images
Amber RoseIf it weren’t for those shield-inspired sunnies, Amber Rose might have stayed on the other side of awful. But this chick always wears her shades inside. And while we understand that those paparazzi lights can be bright, the glasses have got to go. Getty Images
Martha StewartWe can only guess that Martha Stewart made enough mashed potatoes to feed an army and then wore the sack that the vegetables had been stored in. Why else? Perhaps a belted waist would make for a more flattering silhouette.Getty Images
Blake LivelyThis look gives us a tooth ache. Blake Lively arrived at the Café Society premiere wearing a dress adorned with tufts of cotton candy. We get that the star is expecting her second child, but can she slow down with the under-five club outfit choices? Getty Images
CiaraCiara and football husband Russell Wilson were also at the ESPYS. But we’re sending the singer straight to the penalty box for the barely-there, pink floor-length gown she chose to wear. Getty Images
Julianne HoughGive us a B! Give us an O! Give us an R! Give us an E! Give us a D! What does that spell? Bored! And that’s exactly how this yawn-inducing button-up and plain blue shorts, make us feel. Getty Images
Gabrielle UnionAt the ESPYS event this week, actress Gabrielle Union showed up with half her dress missing. Oops. The nubby tweed fabric and dramatic slit in her skirt were not the match made in heaven we were looking for. Getty Images
Keyshia ColeSinger Keyshia Cole missed the memo that this red carpet was not a dress up party. From her Grecian-inspired headband and metallic foliage to the feathers hanging from her waist, this getup gets a giant foam thumbs down. Getty Images
Kristen WiigKristen Wiig’s jumpsuit looks like it had had a serious scrap with spring. The high neckline looks suffocating, and the whole thing is lacking any silhouette. This jumpsuit should be left in the botanical gardens and covered with soil—maybe it’ll sprout into something more fashionable. Getty Images
Lil KimAfter a long hiatus from the red carpet, Lil Kim randomly popped up this week. The rapper rocked a pair of knee-highs and a blazer with pretty much nothing underneath. Kim, can you go back to doing whatever it was that was keeping you away from the red carpets, plz and tx?Getty Images
Meghan RienksActress Meghan Rinks attended the Ghostbusters premiere in a dress that looked like the Headless Horseman. Or, at least like a dress that had its top chopped off. The unflattering bustier bra is frightening, and we need back up. Who’re we gonna call? GHOSTBUSTERS! Or a stylist…Getty Images
Andra DaySinger Andra Day stepped out in a chess board-like ensemble. There’s a check mate joke in here somewhere, but we we’re too distracted by the heavy wool that this thing is made out of to make it. It’s making us feel hot and dizzy. Getty Images
Nicole RichieEven The Count can’t keep up with this mess of a shirt. One-ha-ha-ha, two-ha-ha-ha… Nicole Richie’s crisscrossed shirt has too many crisses and crosses to count. Getty Images
Olivia MunnOlivia Munn attended at the ESPYS to support of her boo Aaron Rodgers. But she dropped the ball when she opted for white gown with gold sequins down the front and shoulder pads. Yes, shoulder pads. The crimped hair and cowlick added to the mess.Getty Images