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If you’re a nipple enthusiast, or simply have no problem with seeing female nipples, then unfortunately Instagram is still not the place for you. Instagram CEO Kevin Systrom spoke at a media event recently, and he told the crowd that Instagram would be breaking the Apple app store’s policies for inappropriate content, were it to allow a woman’s nipple to enter into the vast, endless feeds of Instagram.

In fact, if Instagram were to accept that there isn’t much difference between a man and woman’s nipple, then it’d have to, according to Instagram, be re-rated from 12+ to 17+. And Systrom says that if the app were to do such a thing, it would be excluding younger users. Because, of course, teens are strict adherents of age qualifications!

This is all somewhat bizarre, considering Twitter itself is rated 4+ and, if you’ve ever entered that fold, you’ll know there are endless accounts dedicated to porn, weirdness and adult humour-based parody. And yet, there has been no rating change for Twitter, and as of two minutes ago, there are still nipples as far as the eye can see. So the almighty gavel of the Apple app store has not come crashing down on Twitter (yet).

So, if you’re a woman who for her own reasons wants to show a nipple or two on Instagram, cut out the following picture of a man’s nipple and stick it wherever your nips are showing. You are technically not violating terms and conditions, ’cause there are no rules forbidding dudes from showing their areolas. This way you can #freethenipple without risk of your photo being taken down.

nipz

And let’s settle this once and for all, shall we? Do you give a damn about nipples on the Internet?


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