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As Canadian women, we can consider ourselves somewhat fortunate. It’s not The Handmaid’s Tale come to life, with governments dictating what we do to with our bodies, like some states south of the border. And most full-time working women in Canada who are planning to have children have it relatively good too. There’s the full year of maternity leave we get (for some, there’s also the option for up to 18 months), meaning that the complications of having to pump at work might not even cross our minds. Not everyone is so lucky.

Hilary Duff recently posted a gorgeous photo of herself breastfeeding her six-month-old daughter, Banks. A picture of comfort and contentment. But her lengthy caption conveyed the opposite. Because while she would’ve liked to breastfeed Banks longer, Duff simply couldn’t take it anymore.

 

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THIS ONE’S FOR THE LADIES Just a few thoughts that I wanted to share on Breast-feeding. Last week was my last week nursing Banks (my six month old) I am a working mom of two. My goal was to get my little girl to six months and then decide if I (and her of course) wanted to keep going. Let me tell you. Pumping at work sucks. I had zero down time and am usually pumping in a hair and make up trailer while four hands work to get me ready for the next scene with lots of other people around. Even if I had the luxury to be in my own room, it’s not even considered a “break” because you have to sit upright for the milk to flow into the bottles! Plus you are having your damn nipples tugged at by an aggressive machine that makes an annoying sound, that echoes through your head day and night (I swear that machine and I had many conversations at midnight and 3 am)! Ttttthen having to find someplace to sterilize bottles and keep your milk cold (ok I’m done with that rant lol)! Anyway, I didn’t know this because with Luca I didn’t work until he was about nine months old, so I didn’t pump very often. Your milk supply drastically drops when you stop feeding as often and lose the actual contact and connection with your baby (😞). So I was eating all the feunugreek goats butt blessed thistle fennel cookies/drops/shakes/pills I could get my hands on! It was maddening. (Does fenugreek make anyone else smell like maple syrup and rubber gloves?…not chill) With all of this complaining, I want to say I enjoyed (almost) every moment of feeding my daughter. Felt so lucky to be so close to her and give her that start. I know many women are not able to and for that I am sympathetic and very grateful that I could. For six wonderful months. But I needed a break. I was going to break. With the stress of a dropping milk supply and a baby that was getting bored or not caring about nursing when I was available to. I was sad and frustrated and feeling like a failure all of the time. When really I’m a bad ass rock star. Moms get high on feeling like superwoman…because we are! Doing too much, because we can! KEEP READING in the comments below 👇🏼♥️

A post shared by Hilary Duff (@hilaryduff) on

Yes, we hear you, she’s a wealthy celebrity and could choose to stay home, but the sentiment is universal. So many women go through the same roller coaster of emotions and being “sad and frustrated and feeling like a failure all of the time,” be it from breastfeeding or some other mom-related thing. It just comes with the territory; as soon as a woman becomes a mother, the guilt is almost automatic.

For Duff, and presumably many new moms in her industry, it has to be rough in its own way. Yes, there are definitely huge perks with that life, but when you consider the long days, the demands of appearing a certain way, having people always around, working on your face and your hair and your body all while you’re trying to pump, then finding somewhere to store it? It’s exhausting just wrapping our heads around it all.

And those are just the mechanics of it. The actual breastfeeding part took a toll on Duff. Her body just couldn’t keep up with the demand and her supply was dropping because Hilary and Banks were missing actual physical contact. Duff was stressed and was busting her ass for every precious drop for “a baby that was getting bored or not caring,” and, well, Hil made a game-time decision.

 

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I do what I want.

A post shared by Hilary Duff (@hilaryduff) on

Whether this was a tough choice for Hilary or it came easy, either way it must’ve been bittersweet. But she definitely shouldn’t feel like she’s failed her little girl. In fact, she’s doing what’s best. Moms need to do what works for them, because in the long run it filters down to everyone else. A healthier, happier, less stressed mom should be the goal for every family.

Maybe Hilary’s post will be an inspiration to other moms who are equally stressed and feeling the same feelings she was, and is. We have to love how she ended it with positivity and hope. She knows she’s a bad ass rock star and all-around superwoman — just like all the other moms out there.

 

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BFFs

A post shared by Hilary Duff (@hilaryduff) on