In the grand tradition of Cabbage Patch Kids and Shopkins, Minecraft and Snoopy Sno-Cone Machines come Bunchems, this year’s must-have toy. The colourful balls are meant to stick to each other, making building — anything from animals and bugs to cars and buildings — fun. You can squish them, connect with other Bunchem balls and the limits to kids’ creativity are endless. Seems like the perfect toy, right? Uh, not quite.
Sure, they seem harmless. Come on, look, that one down there has a moustache. But if those spongy balls could, they’d be twirling those handlebars like the dastardly villains they are. Because not only do the spheres stick together but they also stick to kids’ hair. And it’s driving parents crazy.
Exhibit A: The Culprits
Just look at them. They might look vibrant and delightful but upon closer examination they’re like burrs. You know, those sticky, gross, evil things that get stuck on your pants and socks and dogs’ fur while out for an otherwise peaceful walk.
Exhibit B: The ball in the hand
This little girl is playing with fire. Or maybe she just knows exactly how far her adorable yet dastardly creation needs to be from her head. But not everyone knows their limits.
Exhibit C: The Mop Top
A side pony doesn’t stand a chance against these evil things.
Exhibit D: The Tentacles
What we’re not seeing is little Matt’s new ‘do, the Lex Luthor.
Exhibit E: The Very Bad Idea
Well, this dude’s obviously hairless now.
Exhibit F: The Calm Before The Storm
Unlike her mother, at least this adorable moppet is smiling.
Exhibit G: The Scalping
Even the brush knows it’s hurting her.
Exhibit H: The Updon’t
Hmm, this actually looks quite pretty. No? Just us then?
Exhibit I: The Bob
At least bobs are in now, right?
Exhibit J: The Disney Debacle
Not even Disney princesses can outrun these bad boys. Bunchems, 1; Merida, 0.
Like it needs to be said but we’ll say it anyway. KEEP BUNCHEMS AWAY FROM ANY AND ALL HAIR. That means no necklaces and definitely no rolling around in it. Honestly. How does this even happen?