Prince George, who is 5, has many things that I wish I had.
A monogrammed bathrobe, for starters, plus wealthy parents, and also a title.
But I’m mostly envious of Prince George’s nickname, which is Archie.
The Sun recently reported that the third in line to the throne was out and about in the Berkshires visiting his grandmother—no, not that one…the other one, Carole Middleton —when a dog walker spotted the little guy playing with his sister Charlotte in a stream. (I swear this isn’t the start of a Brothers Grimm fairy tale.)
“I was asked by a police minder not to take a photo of the children, which I didn’t, but George started stroking my dog,” the unnamed woman told the Sun. “Just to be friendly I engaged in a bit of small talk and I asked George what his name was, even though obviously I knew it. To my astonishment he said ‘I’m called Archie’ with a big smile on his face.”
Where I grew up most people had nicknames based on their surname: Smith became Smitty, Jones became Jonesy, Gilmore became Gilly. Basically, you just added a Y to the end of the last name. We were simple people.
But my last name—Allen—didn’t make for a good nickname. Alleny?
During basketball games, friends cheered me on from the sidelines with “Way to play Jessie Rae!” But I don’t consider that my nickname because it’s actually my name.
At work today, people call me Jess Allen. Again, that is my name.
I’ve never had a nickname. Scratch that: I’ve never had a nickname that stuck because in Grade 4 while crushing on Ricky Schroeder who’s nickname on Silver Spoons was “the Rickster” I started referring to myself as “the Jesster” only it didn’t catch on the way I’d hoped.
Meanwhile, Prince George apparently has more than one nickname: while still in-utero his parents called him “our little grape”. The Sun says he is also referred to as “PG” at school, short I presume for Prince George, which then morphed into PG Tips at home, which is very, very cool actually.
I think it’s too late in the game for me to get a good nickname. But it’s never too late for a monogrammed bathrobe.
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