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Man rescues slab of BBQ ribs during late night fire

Forget the kids, save the meat! OK, we’re kidding. At around 3 a.m. on Wednesday, hungry California resident Robert Wright threw some ribs onto his barbecue. Soon after, a fire broke out in the unit next to his, so Wright immediately carried his family to safety. But it was what he did next that was a little bizarre. “First thing, I got my kids. Then I thought about my ribs. I didn’t want to let my ribs burn and stuff, ‘cause I take pride in what I do,” he reportedly said. Rushing back into the flames, he made sure to save his meat (which we’re sure was well done at that point). There haven’t been any reports of injuries from the fire.

Canadian Cops Found A Knife-Wielding Unicorn Chasing Someone Through A Graveyard

There ain’t no rainbows in this fairy tale, folks. At around 7 p.m. Monday, police in B.C. received a rather strange 911 call: a knife-wielding unicorn was apparently chasing a man through a cemetary. Naturally, police took the call with a healthy dose of skepticism. But when they arrived on scene, the officers admitted “…it was exactly as it was described.” An armed man in a unicorn mask was literally chasing a screaming victim through a graveyard. Turns out though, the whole thing was just a gag-video shoot. The two men apologized and no one was charged.

Newly hired man accidentally sends nude selfies to HR director

“Am I qualified now?” A man in Chicago who had just been hired for a job mistakenly sent a pair of naked selfies to the same HR manager who just gave him the job. Needless to say, the firm wasn’t impressed with the way the applicant bared his new credentials, and they called the police as a result. Officers say, however, that the 23-year-old man meant to send the X-rated pictures to someone else. While no charges will be laid, that job offer is now off the table.

Shoppers run for their lives as elderly motorist ploughs car through shopping centre

Talk about door-crasher deals! An 87-year-old driver recently plowed straight through the windows of an Australian retail centre, sending shoppers scrambling for cover. The car actually continued moving inside the mall for a brief period, scraping up against some of the walls before coming to a stop. Fortunately, nobody was injured.

Miss Daisy

Britain’s dumbest thief caught seconds after shouting ‘catch me if you can’

Pro tip: You should probably only use that line if you can actually, you know, run. Surveillance video from a convenience store in the U.K. shows a man swiping a drink off a shelf before yelling to the staff “catch me if you can.” Apparently they accepted his challenge, because you can see two clerks bolt after the man, bringing him back into the store only seconds later. While the store owners were on the phone with police, the man stole yet another drink from the shelf–which was also caught on video. It’s not immediately clear whether the man was charged.

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