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This week was the Season 14 premiere of Grey’s Anatomy (Thursdays at 8 p.m. ET on CTV) and it packed a double episode that had the doctors working triple time.

There was blood, there were guts, there were people coming back from the dead, and people that are soon going to be dead. And yes, there was also sex. But what was truly different about this week’s premiere was that Grey’s Anatomy out-Greyed itself, fitting in more love triangles than we thought possible in one hospital. And this is only the surgical wing!

How many triangles do you see? The answer: a whole lot.

JO – ALEX – DELUCA – GLASSES

It was beginning to look like we were in for another season of DeLuca being in love with Jo, but thankfully that fizzled out quickly. Instead, Jo made the terrible decision to have sex with Glasses Intern, whose name we and probably Jo will never learn. Amazingly, Alex found out and laughed. We totally thought this kid was going to end up on a gurney. Alex finally came clean about finding Jo’s ex-husband, and since Alex didn’t kill the guy, Jo is now ready to forgive him. True love wins, y’all.

MEREDITH – NATHAN – MEGAN

Is it cruel of us to say that Megan shouldn’t be surprised a guy that was cheating on her when she went MIA has moved on to another relationship? In all fairness to Nathan, Megan had been presumed dead for ten years. Meredith tried to stay out of the reunited couple’s way by being in their way as much as possible, including performing not one, but two surgeries on Megan. The real kicker came when Meredith interrupted an impromptu proposal from Nathan, who snapped the ring box shut way too fast. Megan, take your new tummy and find a man who appreciates you.

APRIL – AVERY – MAGGIE

Here’s a triangle that is somehow depressing us more than the triangle where one of the parties was held as a prisoner for ten years. If Avery and April stay together, Maggie is sad. If Avery and Maggie get together, April is sad. If no one gets together, we don’t get to see Avery without his scrubs on and we’re sad. Love sucks.

AMELIA – OWEN – TEDDY

Teddy is back and ready to have her heart broken once again by Owen. We know that’s what’s going to happen, right? Owen finally realized that he had the perfect woman in front of him and now he’ll likely run back to Amelia to fulfill his ‘Protector’ quota for the year. We were so happy to see the return of Teddy, but if it just means we have to watch her pine for an oblivious Owen, then we’d rather go back to pretending she was off somewhere with Scott Foley 2.0. Also, if Amelia is allowed to perform her own brain surgery because she’s the only Dr. Shepard left, we may have to stop watching Grey’s. Just kidding, we’ll never quit this show.

ELIZA – ARIZONA – CARINA

Welp, Arizona learned the term ‘ghosting’ firsthand, so it doesn’t look like this triangle is going to last very long. We’re all for Arizona hooking up with DeLuca’s gorgeous sister, but we are still wondering why Carina has an accent and Andrew Andreas doesn’t. We didn’t think DeLuca could get any dreamier, but that was before we knew an Italian accent was an option.

Grey’s Anatomy airs Thursdays at 8 p.m. ET on CTV.