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Jessica Simpson got married to Eric Johnson and went and changed her name. Hmm, does J-Johns have the same ring as J-Simp? Actually, heck, yeah! We think it might even be better.

Simpson, er, Johnson has come a long way since her Newlyweds days with first husband, Nick Lachey. Granted, it has been nearly 12 years but the transformation is kind of extraordinary.

Follow along and see if you don’t agree:

 

She was a virgin for her first marriage.

jess young

 

With Eric, Jess waited until she they had two kids before exchanging vows.

Back in the day, she wasn’t sure if Chicken of the Sea was poultry or fish.

fish chicken

 

She became a spokesperson for Weight Watchers so we’re pretty sure she now knows her tuna from her chicken. Right?

kesha confused

 

She used to be a pop star.

jess singing

 

Now she’s a fashion designer/business woman/billionaire mogul. Impressive!

fashion models

 

She was once lambasted for wearing a “Real Girls Eat Meat” T-shirt.

jess meat

 

Jess went vegan for two weeks leading up to her wedding.

seinfeld get out

 

When she went to the bathroom to go… number two, she used to refer to it as going to “drop some kids in the pool.”

jlaw gross

 

Now there are actual kids in her pool — or, in this case, bathtub. (That’s Jess’ son, Ace, and her pal, CaCee Cobb’ son.)

She once said: “I adore John Mayer. I don’t see how anything that surrounds John could be negative.” Silly wabbit.

john mayer

 

We’re sure all she has left to say about Mayer is anything but positive.

duh

 

She vowed to not look like Daisy Duke and wear a bathing suit every day.

jess no

 

She probably doesn’t but she sure posts a lot of Instagram pics of herself in them.

Really, it’s like it’s all come full circle. Well done, Jess!