They’re sneaky, cunning and down right naughty. We’re talking about animals, folks.
You might think these creatures are cute and cuddly, but you better believe that within their ranks there are criminals just waiting to pounce at the opportunity to do bad things. Don’t believe us? Here’s some definitive proof:
Disorderly head-butting goat on the lose
Earlier this month, police received multiple calls from residents in New Jersey complaining about a disorderly goat who was repeatedly head-butting a door. Three officers were sent out to pursue the head-butter and chased him down a roadway. He was finally caught and sent to an animal control facility.
Cat holds owners hostage in their own home
A moody black cat named Kush was anything but chill when her owner supposedly stepped on her tail (by accident) in the middle of the night. Going into a fit of rage, Kush attacked the owner and his wife and then proceeded to trap them in their bedroom. Left with no other choice, the couple were forced to call 911.
And this isn’t the first time someone had to call the cops on their housecat. A family in Oregon went through the same ordeal when their 22-pound cat trapped them in their bedroom. The animal attacked their seven-month-old child after the baby pulled its tail. Man, cats don’t play.
Canadian geese are shitting all over America
If this isn’t vandalism, we don’t know what is. Officials in Washington, D.C. are releasing the dogs on Canadian geese who are destroying the State’s Reflecting Pool, the Washington Monument grounds and John F. Kennedy Hockey Fields with their a tonne of poop. Nasty!
Giant cat delays train indefinitely
If you use public transit and you’re trying to get to work on time, make sure there isn’t a giant cat blocking the tracks. No word yet on when the train delay will end. We estimate it’ll take a very long time, because this cat doesn’t seem to have a care in the world.
Brazen beaver attack leaves man rattled
Note to self: Don’t anger an “adorable” beaver. This little guy seems to have gotten away after attacking a stranger who was a little too in love with him. Maybe the authorities are searching for the beaver, maybe not. We’ll never know.
Camels eating kids is a thing
No, seriously. Once they have a taste of that adorable baby hair, they can’t get enough. It’s becoming a real problem.
If you think these criminal animals are bad, the ones in this video are going to scare the living daylights out of you: