The arrival of spring had many of us squealing with excitement, but that excitement came to an abrupt halt when Mother Nature decided to ruin everything. We have been teased for weeks on end with this hot today, cold tomorrow nonsense. We just want to jump into our summer best, right? And why must we be punished for that? Whether you want to believe it or not, this is a very Canadian experience, so let’s walk through the emotional trauma all Canadians experience when we try our hardest to embrace a warmer season that’s not quite here…yet.
WE BEAM WITH EXCITEMENT OVER THE PROSPECT OF SWITCHING OVER OUR CLOSET
Those moments when you rediscover all of your favourite warm weather pieces are filled with so much anticipation, you swear you might burst into a happy dance.
REALIZING YOU’RE A CRAZY BAG LADY AS YOU PREPARE FOR ANY WEATHER, EVEN SNOW
Umbrella? Check. Sweater? Check. Scarf? Check. Flats to change into? Check. Feeling like a crazy person with the bags of crap you are now carrying? Check! Check! Check!
THE PAIN OF BEING TOO HOT
You hate to admit it, but in those first few days into spring, it’s not unlikely that you’ll find yourself overdressed for unseasonable warmth. And being too hot in those instances can feel like pure torture. Your panicked internal monologue will no doubt sound something like this: but it just snowed yesterday!
THE MISERY OF BEING TOO COLD
Of course, freezing your buns off is also an option, and that’s when you quickly want to resort back to being too hot. It’s a confusing time.
CRYING OVER WASTED MASCARA
There are those times when it rains and you forget to wear waterproof mascara, leaving you looking like you just got your heart broken.
LOSING YOUR S–T OVER A RANDOM SNOWFALL
You recognize you are living in Canada, but C’MON, this is just ridiculous. You have already packed away your boots and warmer jackets, so now what the heck are you going to do? Mood officially ruined.
DEALING WITH THE ONGOING FRUSTRATION OF LOOKING STYLISH IN RUBBER BOOTS
It doesn’t matter how cute the print or how subtle the colour, trying to look cute in rubber boots can often feel like trying to pair Crocs with … well, anything.
SCREAMING WITH INDECISION OVER WHAT TO WEAR
Sorting out what to wear on any given day during this in-between period creates so much stress. It’s like you have to be a psychic, right? It’s a warm morning, so you want to wear a skirt, but then you have to factor in the threat of a looming ice-rainstorm. What did we do to deserve this?
DEALING WITH ANXIETY OVER HOW SOON IS ‘TOO SOON’ TO WEAR YOUR FAVE MAXI DRESS
It sits there in your closet, taunting you with its sleeveless ways and comfy demure.
BITING BACK THE PAIN OF COLD ANKLES
Those Chuck Taylors are begging to see the light of day, but that chill up the ankle is an absolute jerk to contend with.
DRESSING IN YOUR BEST TO HIT UP THE PATIO — AND GETTING REJECTED
So, it’s perfect outside, and all you want is to get all dolled up and enjoy the sun on your favourite patio. Well, so does everyone else in your city and they got to the patio before you.
FACING INDECISION WHEN YOU REACH FOR YOUR SUNGLASSES
It’s not always a matter of which sunnies will match best with your outfit. It’s about which sunnies will make the best statement, and the struggles involved in deciding that are SO real.
THAT OUTBURST OF HAPPINESS YOU EXPERIENCE WHEN YOU WALK PAST A STORE WITH SHORTS IN THE WINDOW
The temperatures may state otherwise, but your legs are ready for their grand reveal.
DEALING WITH THE SHOCK OF YOUR FRIZZY HAIR
Hello, heat, it’s been a while. Oh, hello frizzy hair, you’re here, too? Once humidity returns, so does your problem hair, and that’s when you realize that the thing you thought you were missing is actually your biggest enemy.
MOURNING THE LOSS OF YOUR VAMPY LIPSTICKS
Sure, you could still rock those darker shades, but in the light of the sunshine, people will surely think you’ve gone goth.
GETTING EXCITED OVER WEARING COLOUR AGAIN
Colour? Is that, like, a thing? The dark days over.
FEELING SELF-CONSCIOUS WHEN YOU WEAR RIDING BOOTS
Will anyone really notice if you wear these for one more day?
STRESSING OVER WHETHER YOUR OUTFIT IS ‘OFFICE APPROPRIATE’
It’s so tough when all you want to do is feel comfortable in your cubicle. Even you haven’t seen your bare shoulders in a while, but it’s just skin, so what’s the big deal?
DEALING WITH THE GREAT BEARD DEBATE
Hmmm, you could shave off the ol’ beard, or you could use it to catch sweat for the next four months. The choice is yours, fellas.
SHAMING YOUR PASTY WHITE SKIN
Feel like you’re seeing a ghost when you look in the mirror? Hey, summer isn’t all tans and balmy beach days. If you’re pale, you never leave home without some SPF, even though you wish you could at least look like you’ve had sun in the last 20 years.
FRANTICALLY CHECKING YOUR WEATHER APP
… And asking a million times over what the hell is going on with the weather? You’re never going to get used to this–it’s in your Canadian blood, and you still haven’t adjusted. So, just keep refreshing that app, because it’s bound to be the perfect tempertaure eventually.