Racy, sex-positive editorial is how Cosmo gets its edge. But the advice featured here has us wondering – are they just making it all up?
What Cosmo says: Devour his penis like an ice cream cone.
What we say: We are far too enthusiastic about handheld desserts for this to be a safe sex strategy.
What Cosmo says: Don’t try your fantasies with your lover because – hey girl – you know your boyfriend could never match your Ryan Gosling daydreams.
What we say: Exploring fantasies is a great way for partners to better understand – and pleasure – each other.
What Cosmo says: Give him a beer facial.
What we say: Give him a beer.
What Cosmo says: Have someone hide in the closet but don’t tell your partner.
What we say: Voyeurism is cool, if that’s your thing, but consent is key.
What Cosmo says: Talk about science to get in the mood.
What we say: Admittedly, this might work on some folks, but it’s hardly universal. Gauge your lover’s interest before peppering him or her with literal chemistry lessons.
What Cosmo says: Use sex as a bribe, trading sexual favours for chores like cleaning the bathroom.
What we say: Clean the damn bathroom when it’s your turn to clean the damn bathroom and don’t conflate sexual pleasure – elective, fun – with household chores – necessary, boring.
What we say: Seriously, Cosmo? Out of GOT’s sexy cast of characters, you choose Hodor?
What Cosmo says: Wear a wet white t-shirt to bed.
What we say: Save the spring break fantasies for the shower.
What Cosmo says: Caress his treasure trail with a silk scarf or cashmere gloves.
What we say: Save on dry-cleaning bills and substitute fine cotton scarves and soft leather gloves, instead.
What Cosmo says: Bite his tongue and don’t let go.
What we say: You need his tongue. Don’t hurt it.
What Cosmo says: Turn your favorite bib necklace into a naughty love charm.
What we say: Umm, okay. But only if you don’t have any hair down there, because getting stuck in your jewels will definitely prevent his jewels from getting stuck in you.