Don’t you just love it when Science finds its way into the bedroom?
The latest scientific study to shed some light on our sex lives has tackled the age-old issue of pillow talk. Specifically, why most men are significantly less talkative after sex than women.
Turns out it’s not your man’s fault he doesn’t want to chat or cuddle afterward. It’s his hormones!
The study, conducted by researchers at the University of Connecticut, measured the testosterone levels of participants and then had them keep a ‘sex diary’ (for lack of a better term) that logged moments of intimacy and the communication or lack thereof that followed.
What they discovered was that many people (some women, but mostly men) with an above-average level of testosterone are less likely to engage in positive, post-coital conversation. Basically, the more macho the nacho, the less chatty he’ll be after sex—and the more likely that whatever he does say will be negative.
For those with higher levels of T, pillow talk appears more risky and less likely to result in a stronger connection than to those without higher than average T levels. This despite the fact that, as the researchers point out, “post-sex communication may serve ‘an important role’ in not only sustaining a satisfying sexual relationship between partners, but may also contribute to more general feelings of relationship satisfaction and closeness.”
So while you may be feeling cuddly and talkative in your post-intimacy glow, there’s a chance that your partner, at a very base level, doesn’t feel the same.
Thanks a lot for identifying the reason, Science. Now what’s the solution? Because we could all use a little more of this: