In movies, criminals are often portrayed as evil masterminds capable of outwitting tactical police forces and even heroic protagonists.
Real life, however, paints a very different picture.
The bumbling buffoons we’re about to show you represent the crème de la crème of stupidity. They’re the kinds of people who screw up so bad, that it almost becomes an impressive feat of its own.
We’ll start off with the guy who thought it would be a good idea to rob a store in his own local community. A store that was also owned by someone the thief’s Facebook friends apparently knew. If you think this is going to end badly, you’d be correct:
Next up: the genius who called 911 for legal advice. His big question? “Yeah hi. I just grew some marijuana plants and I’m wondering how much trouble I could get in if caught.” The cops are never going to find this guy:
This criminal fails so hard, you’ll almost feel sorry for him. After attempting to rob a rug store, he quickly realizes that he’s been locked in by the owner. Once spotted, a small scuffle ensues and the thief ends up being rolled into a carpet so he can’t escape. Talk about humiliating!
You can’t mess with Judge Judy. Everyone – well, almost everyone – knows that. That’s why if you’re a chronic liar like this thief, you have to be on your best game if you want to outsmart her. This guy, not so much. Hope you have a golden star set aside for this one:
If robbing people on the street, a good escape plan is key. That’s a lesson this crook learned the hard way, after he ran directly into a glass door:
This next guy, on the other hand, over prepared on the escape. After he hops out of his car to commit a quick hit and run on the vehicle behind him, the culprit quickly realizes that he left his car in drive and has to chase it down the street – empty handed. Maybe now he’ll consider meaningful employment:
Right off the bat, there are a few indications that this beer bandit might be new to the whole “crime” thing. The first indication: He’s stealing beer. The second: He probably drank a lot of other beers before deciding to do this:
You’d think this would go without saying, but if you’re going to steal cars, make sure you can actually drive them! This crook steals a truck while holding up the driver at gunpoint. But once inside, he’s seen struggling before finally giving up, and running away:
Most people would learn their lesson after going through the trauma of being arrested. But not this girl. Not only does she manage to piss off the judge enough for him to double her fine, she ends it by flipping him a hand gesture that literally gets her sent to jail. Maybe she’ll learn her lesson in there: