Listen, we’re all for fun. We try to have fun most every day, especially on the weekends. But we don’t have fun ALL the time. That is to say, we don’t JUST want to have fun…even if we are girls.
But Cyndi Lauper, bad-babe rocker from the ’80s, whom we love and respect and dance to every time she comes on the air, is still styling herself like it’s nothing but fun all the time. The wild pink hair, lacy top, black tights and combat boots that she wore to a recent CMT event are so enthusiastically playful they’d look more at home at the circus. A very, very dark circus.
So, we’ll have a little fun at her expense, and the other worst-dressed of the week.
Fashion took a dark and scary turn this week
Lady GagaThis tuxedo-inspired getup that Gaga wore this week makes her look like a magician’s assistant. Her bottom half seamlessly blends into any dark background she’s standing next to—no, it’s not the photographer’s fault. We can’t decide which is worse, the elbow-high black gloves, or the suffocating neckline on the top. For her next trick, we’d like to see Lady Gaga transform into a better outfit. Poof! Getty Images
Zosia MametGirls actress Zosia Mamet got a new apartment last week, and her only mirror broke during move. Just kidding. But we are really concerned that Zosia doesn’t own a mirror. Her ill-fitting white turtleneck with a flimsy, floral print jumper thrown overtop looks so sloppy and juvenile. The black booties are the only remotely good part about this look, and even those can’t save her this week.Getty Images
Tina FeyDid Tina Fey buy this dress at a Hunger Games’ wardrobe department blow-out sale? Seriously, this red number, with it’s flame-like bottom, looks just like Katniss Everdeen’s 'Girl on Fire' dress from the film. All Tina needs to complete this look is a chariot with Peeta Mellark inside.Getty Images
Helena Bonham CarterHelena Bonham Carter is known for her avant garde style. We dig her confidence. But this look is just too much of a mess not to comment on. The fishnet-like material, with it’s inconsistently placed cut-outs, is bad, bad, bad. Helena looks like a creepy character from a Tim Burton—her now ex-husband—film.Getty Images
Teresa PalmerActress Teresa Palmer looks a bit too Vegas Showgirl—and not the classy kind. The oversized sequin embellishments on her micro-mini dress are tacky, especially when paired with strappy sky-high heels. The side-part hair and smoky makeup add to this less than elegant look. Getty Images
Freida PintoColouring books for adults are totally trendy right now. We can’t get enough of them! Yet Freida Pinto seems to have taken this trend too literally… her dress looks like a page torn out of an art therapy colouring book. Excuse us while we grab our pencil crayons and go to town. Yeah, yeah, we’ll try to stay inside the lines. Getty Images
Holland RodenActress Holland Roden’s one-shoulder floor-length gown looks like a pepper grinder that your eclectic aunt brought back from Marrakech (and you just know the salt grinder doesn’t match). The slicked back hair and Art Deco clutch miss the mark. Getty Images
Jurnee Smollett-BellRemember Michelle’s best friend, Denise, on Full House? Well this is her, all grown up. While we loved Jurnee Smollett-Bell’s character on the (now revived) sit-com, we’re confused by her fashion choices in adulthood. This off-the-shoulder black peasant dress gives the actress an awkward shape—those sleeves are awful—and the gladiator lace-up heels look dated.Getty Images
Angela BassetAngela Bassett usually looks well put together—we’re into her boss-lady style—but, tragically, this was not her week. The director/actress’ black wide-leg pants are what polyester nightmares are made of, and the white sleeveless top is just a tad too short. Getty Images
Zoey DeschanelZooey Deschanel had a lot to celebrate this week—it was the 100th episode of New Girl! We just wish she’d put a bit more effort into her celebratory look. The stiff, white, knee-length dress, punctuated with a strange black bow, looks incomplete. The quirky actress tried to add pops of pink with the kitten heels and satin clutch, but there was no saving this dull dress.Getty Images
Hannah SimoneAh, this is a classic case of wearing a shirt as a dress. Hannah Simone could have saved this outfit by pulling on a pair of black leather tights—she would have looked edgy and cool! Instead, the pin-stripe “mini dress” (seriously, we think this is a shirt!) with its bits of black fringe make Hannah look incomplete. Getty Images
Annie MurphyWe love Schitt’s Creek actress Annie Murphy, which is why it hurts us to see her looking so frumpy. The ripped black denim jeans are fine, but it’s the oversized boyfriend blazer layered over a black v-neck top that makes us cringe. A simple silk blouse and a pair of sleek heels could have completely transformed this look.Getty Images
Kellie PicklerKellie Pickler looks like she’s going to a country music event, which she was. But the outfit she chose was for a Christmas country event, which it, sadly, was not. Getty Images
Megalyn EchikunwokeActress Megalyn Echikunwoke’s red carpet look is having an identity crisis. The see-through black fabric floating overtop of the black mini skirt is pretty much on-trend, but it’s the black leather bodice and thick black leather band around the waist that we’re confused by. Also: is that a single black leather bike glove? Just, no.Getty Images
Hilary DuffThis bright red jumpsuit looks like a pile of unused Christmas wrapping paper. It’s March. We don’t want to think about Christmas for another nine months or so, Hilary. The off 3/4-sleeve juxtaposed with super wide-leg bottoms looks unbalance. This look could use some accessories, stat. Getty Images
Cindy LauperCyndi, we know you just wanna have fun, but this ratty pink hair has got to go. The black lacy top, black tights with subtle cut-outs, and combat boots look like the iconic songstress is ready to attend a Sex Pistols’ concert in the late ’70s. Get the DeLorean ready for time travel, Doc!Getty Images
Katie HolmesSince divorcing Tom Cruise, it’s like we got sweet, smiley Joey Potter back. Hooray! Unfortunately, we also got the late ’90s fashion that Katie wore on Dawson’s Creek, too. The micro-print dress, with its frilly tiered bottom, is childish. And the leather jacket—which we love on its own—just doesn’t work with this girly dress. The pointy black heels make even less sense. Getty Images