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It’s been two months since Linkin Park’s frontman, Chester Bennington, took his own life. Now, his widow, Talinda Bennington, is making it her mission to let people know that those who suffer from depression don’t always show that side of themselves to the outside world — or even to those closest to them. Because depression doesn’t look like anything. A person can be smiling one moment, and completely different the next. Which was exactly the case with Chester. So Talinda released the last video of her husband in an attempt to raise awareness of what depression can look like.

Talinda went on to post the video, which was taken 36 hours before her husband’s death. It showed the musician eating those nasty flavoured jelly beans with his family, having a grand and gross time.

So damn tragic. And bittersweet. Normally, a video like this posted to Twitter would be heartwarming, but knowing that he felt like suicide was the only way to escape from his depression a mere two days later is devastating.

This isn’t the first time Talinda has attempted to spread the word on depression and it’s elusive nature. Earlier this month she posted a family photo captured “days before” Chester’s death.

Talinda’s now trying to get more people talking about mental illness and sharing their stories, so the stigma and shame that surrounds depression comes to an end. And people are answering, often thanking Talinda for her deeply personal share and letting her know just how vital this video is. Chester would be proud.