Planning a vacation is often equal parts crazy-stressful and super-fun. When a couple goes on a trip, that stress can sometimes bubble over into quarrels, resentments and down-right hostility. That seems to be the case for one writer to The Slate’s
advice column, “Dear Prudence.”
The advice-seeker, “To EuroTrip or not to EuroTrip,” tells Prudence that she and her boyfriend of three years are going on an anniversary vacation to Europe in a month but she feels like she’s stuck doing all the planning. She says that it seems to be the same every time they go on a vacation and even when she asks him to help out or make suggestions about what he wants to do, he’ll either deflect or get defensive.
EuroTrip says this pattern reveals itself in other smaller relationship moments too when she expresses a need her BF isn’t meeting and he takes it as a personal attack. It would seem this trip is just aggravating an already-present communication problem.
While this couple’s issues seem to be deeper than who booked the flight, unequal responsibility in planning a trip is a common irritation for couples. Is it okay for one person to do all the planning? Should both parties be involved or is that too many cooks in the kitchen?
Who does the travel planning in your relationship?